The honest, if grudging, respect of his peers, rather than the insincere respect he got because they felt they had to give it. The knowledge that he’d done the absolute best job he was capable of in any sense, rather than just the formality of a job fairly well done and then praised far beyond what it deserved. The thrill of taking a risk, daring to take a chance, and seeing it pay off, rather than staying in the careful bounds of safe perfectionism. Having friends who liked you so deeply they stayed your friend even when they wanted to throttle you, rather than friends who only knew you on such a shallow level that they’d never encountered anything that would make them even feel put-off, much less homicidal. Living, in the now and in the moment, rather than just being good for some nebulous future payoff that might or might not happen. Because this was not a test, none of this was a test, so everything that you did now mattered; this moment, this heartbeat, had as much value as the ones you’d have fifty years from now, and should be used and lived to its fullest potential.
手头那篇Defensive strategies里面我非常喜欢的一段话,拿来共勉,也不知道翻不翻的出这种感觉来啊. ><
